Dump your designer wellies and forget the flower garlands, any front-row festival fashionista or Euro WAG worth their salt will be sporting one thing only this season – tails.
Yes the world’s gone barking for them. But before you dash down to Savile Row to get fitted, let’s be clear, I’m not talking Downton Abbey-style tails. I’m talking the furry, fluffy, emotionally-driven kind. It’s this summer’s must-wag, that’s going to get you noticed up by the main stage.
Fake tails (scaled, smooth, bright ‘n bushy) are selling out fast at TellTails.co.uk, purveyor of quality caudal appendages. Prices start at £15 and one tail fits all whether you’re a child or a big kid, from domestic cats and woodland squirrels through to exotic pink tigers and neon bright dinosaurs. There’s even a limited edition lizard tail.
There were multiple reports of happy tail-wagging at Glastonbury Festival last year despite the Somme-like conditions and the busy summer party calendar is already encouraging more tell-tail revellers to invest in a fluffy new appendage. And some appear more than content to part with some big bucks in order to express their inner beast. Over at thefowdry.com Moving Tails are taking the premium prosthetic tail to a whole new level. Each one has up to twelve carefully configured mood expressions, triggered by a secret remote control you can control from your pocket or pouch. High-tech tail connoisseurs prepared to fork out £79.99, can twitch, flick, wag, wave or curl at will. Basil Brush, eat your heart out.